Should we try to fix or just listen?

I recently read a book for small group leaders at our church and came across a section that really hit home to me. Here's the text from the book "You can double your class in two years or less." By Josh Hunt.

"We can only fix ourselves. An atmosphere in which we are constantly trying to fix each other will quickly squelch honesty. I do not want a group that is constantly trying to fix me. It does not matter how well-meaning the group is in this. Fixing kills honesty.

I have seen this happen in groups from time and time again. One person will bravely share something that is not working. Someone else will say, "You just need to pray more."Another will tell the person,"Just forgive and forget." ...

If they will hear one another, really listen to the feelings as well as the facts, and bring both together to the Father, the group will find healing. But as long as we are trying to fix each other, God isn't allowed to do much fixing."

In James 5:16 it does not say "Confess your sins, do your best to fix each other."

In different settings, Jonathan and I have recently experienced this where we've asked for prayer and received everything from "Why did you do that?" to "Well, what I do is..." to "Why don't you just..." Granted, many of our friends are our accountability partners. But, there is a very thin line between accountability and judgement. We're guilty of the same thing in our home team and other small groups. It is easy to fall into "helping." This book helped me see that we need to build each other up in Christ not squelch the honesty and make everyone just like ourselves. Please pray for guidance when others ask for prayer! Together God can fix/solve our problems!